leadership

Come Out at Work: As an Immigrant [video]

Haig Chahinian

Call us American-ist. Every time we’ve seen a picture of Arianna Huffington, we expected she spoke with an American accent. Her skin undertone seems pink, her hair is blondish, the Huffington name sounds WASP, really American dominant culture, wouldn’t you say?

Then at last we heard Arianna Stassinopoulos Huffington speak in a video produced by Dreams Across America, below, in which she describes her experience as an immigrant.

Upon closer inspection, we see some slight olive undertones in her skin, Huffington is her married name, plus hair color is easy to change. And lo and behold, she has a glorious Greek accent.

The new chief executive of the Huffington Media Group talks in the video about being born in Greece and going to Cambridge on a scholarship. She recounts moving to America and trying to get rid of her accent–which we interpret as trying to adopt an American accent–because as an immigrant, an accent sets you apart. She says:

I actually tried for a while to get rid of my accent–I haven’t done a very good job as you can hear–and then I kind of embraced it. I realized it was really complicated, changing your accent, and in a sense it’s now part of my identity.

Even the brightest among us sometimes work to change ourselves and fit in, to varying degrees of success, and much of the time–certainly in Huffington’s case–it’s energy wasted. Today she’s known as a charismatic leader, and her accent is part of her charm. She uses her immigrant status to engaging effect, referring to herself as a “Greek peasant girl,” for example.

An accent typically represents so much of who we are. It hints at multi-lingual capabilities, for example.  Those who speak more than one language use a part of their brain that monolingual folks often do not. An accent may also indicate a bi-cultural worldview. A broad perspective like this can be extremely helpful in solving complex problems.

So coming out at work as an immigrant can establish your worldliness, bring out your inner charms, and then land you a $315M merger deal. A pretty sweet realization of the American dream.

Were you born in a country outside of where you live? Are you out at work as an immigrant? How does this influence your work experience?

Photo via

3 “A”s of Ambition

Haig Chahinian

Last week we sat on a panel at Pace University discussing “diversity in the workplace.”  Panelists talked about corporate and non-profit initiatives that exist to promote more integrated places of work, and how students can prepare themselves to talk about issues of identity and organizational dynamics during interviews.

It was an even-keeled evening for a theme that many folks have been socialized to avoid:  essentially how race, class, gender, sexual orientation, religion, ability, ethnicity and age relate to the American social structure. Panelists focused on how students can excel within this reality.

The final discussion prompt was “what career advice do you have for students?” This is what we had to say, in essence:

The upper echelons of organizations still largely lack diversity. While companies write policies about recruiting a fully representative workforce, and many have “diversity offices,” this sometimes allows the top brass to feel they’re working enough to create an integrated environment.  And yet, the pool of Fortune 500 CEOs is comprised mostly of straight White males. How can a young upstart work her way up? Read more →

5 New, Must-Have Skills for the Rough and Tumble 2010s

Haig Chahinian

Speaking of makeovers, the definition of human capital is getting a much-needed refashioning by David Brooks, author of the just-published The Social Animal: The Hidden Sources of Love, Character, and Achievement.

He describes a “new humanism,” and breaks it down into 5 poetic-sounding terms: attunement, equipoise, metis, sympathy and limerence.  From his op-ed piece of March 8, 2011:

Attunement: the ability to enter other minds and learn what they have to offer.

Equipoise: the ability to serenely monitor the movements of one’s own mind and correct for biases and shortcomings.

Metis: the ability to see patterns in the world and derive a gist from complex situations.

Sympathy: the ability to fall into a rhythm with those around you and thrive in groups.

Limerence: This isn’t a talent as much as a motivation. The conscious mind hungers for money and success, but the unconscious mind hungers for those moments of transcendence when the skull line falls away and we are lost in love for another, the challenge of a task or the love of God. Some people seem to experience this drive more powerfully than others.

Trip out, right? These sound like traits of godliness. They also sound somewhat similar to emotional intelligence and social intelligence. The question is, if you’re not the Dalai Lama, how might you develop these skills? Brooks refers to them as “deeper talents,” which suggests that some people have more of a natural ability in these areas than others.

The first step is to identify that these skills are something you wish to develop. Then, considering their complexity, you might benefit from working with a professional guidance counselor like an executive coach or psychologist.

Which is to say, talking about your self relative to acquiring more limerence, metis and equipoise is a helpful way to equip yourself to navigate the world of work in the 2010s, and beyond.

Do you identify as having any combination of these 5 skills? Which ones, and how?

Come Out at Work: As a Woman [video]

Haig Chahinian

We love Iceland. Prime Minister Johanna Sigurdardottir is the first openly lesbian head of government in Europe, if not the world. Icelandair’s beautifully photographed ads on the subway transport us from the pushing crowds at rush hour. And we’ve liked Bjork since her days with The Sugarcubes. Now there’s a new heroine in the media, by the name of Halla Tomasdottir.

In the TED talk above, the founder of Audur Capital makes a number of keen observations about gender and leadership. In relating her own story:

Why would two women who were enjoying successful careers in investment banking in the corporate sector leave to found a financial services firm? Well let it suffice to say that we felt a bit overwhelmed with testosterone… in my country, much like on Wall Street and the city of London and elsewhere, men were at the helm of the game of the financial sector. And that kind of lack of diversity and sameness leads to disastrous problems.

She’s referring to the financial collapse of Iceland in 2008, the biggest of any country in economic history. Tomasdottir goes on:

So it was almost like coming out of the closet to actually talk about the fact that we were women and that we believed that we had a set of values and a way of doing business that would be more sustainable than what we had experienced until then.

It’s rarely easy to talk openly about how your gender impacts business, and the former corporate investment banker’s experience enlightens us about some of the challenges. She further explains:

The whole thing about the female trend is not about women being better than men, it is actually about women being different from men, bringing different values and different ways to the table. So what do you get? You get better decision-making. And you get less herd behavior. And both of those things hit your bottom line with very positive results.

Love her! Businesses benefit from the multiplicity of values and perspectives that a diverse group of people bring when they freely exercise their whole selves at work.

The title sounds like it may be about the plight of transitioning gender from male to female, yet we’ll explore that in a future post. We’re struck by the poignance of coming out at work with a part of one’s self that’s so readily visible, and obvious.

It’s poignant because Tomasdottir (pictured at right, on left) reveals to us the meaning of her gender relative to her work. And for being in tune with this part of her self, she’s handsomely rewarded.

Video via TED, image via

How Naked Feelings Improve Leadership

Haig Chahinian

Q: When is pain good to feel?

A: When you’re in a leadership position, and you may be avoiding it.

Actually, emotional pain is important to feel any time you experience it, regardless of your position.

In his post called “Why Leaders Must Feel Pain,” Peter Bregman describes the necessity for leaders to embrace difficult emotions, so as to bring humanity to their relationships and effectively elevate their leadership abilities.

Bregman recounts with brutal honesty his experience attending a week-long seminar that prompted some intense self-reflection, emotional release, and the subsequent application to business and leadership.

In revealing his naked feelings in the post, Bregman demonstrates leadership himself. Indeed, we all could have better work lives by connecting to emotions we strive to avoid. Imagine all the additional energy you could direct to accomplishing things, rather than hiding what’s inside you!

How can you feel painful yet life-affirming emotions in the workplace, without necessarily attending a leadership retreat? Keep reading this blog to find out.

When have your painful feelings helped you at work?

Image of Hilda Dokubo via

Not Listening at Work Can Be a Pain in the Mouth

Haig Chahinian

During a session of the Upper House’s constitutional affairs commission in Argentina this week, legislator Graciela Camano hit talkative lawmaker Carlos Kunkel on the mouth. Is this a reasonable resolution to a budget argument? Not really.

Aggression is an all-too-real component of human nature, so of course it exists in the workplace.  Because these feelings can be hard to tolerate–in yourself or in others–it may be helpful to work towards:

1. How you can channel aggressive feelings more productively, and
2. How we all might prevent frustration on the job from turning into rage.

We can relate to what Camano must have felt leading up to that slap: anger, competition, disappointment, frustration and resentment–a veritable cornucopia of unpleasant emotions. While it’s difficult to manage such feelings from workday to workday, physical assault is never an acceptable solution. Unless you’re a professional boxer, natch.

So what’s a workable solution?

In the video, it appears that neither Camano nor Kunkel is listening to the other. Camano stated she’s “been putting up with him all year long” and that “he is always attacking” her, which suggests they may not have a history of listening to each other.

Because budget-related issues often underscore complex, ideological questions, all lawmakers involved in the Upper House’s constitutional affairs commission could benefit from improving their active listening skills.

Have you lost control of yourself at work? What prompted you, and what resulted?