staying true to yourself

Sisters Doing It for Themselves (Brothers Are, Too) [video]

Haig Chahinian

The foundation of our civilization is shifting. Feel it?  NEW New York City, or Non-traditional Employment for Women in NYC, is paving the way (couldn’t help it) towards ground-breaking (stop us!) change in the limits we all place around professional development.  Check out the organization’s mission:

Founded in 1978, NEW is a sector-based workforce development program that prepares women for careers in the construction, transportation, energy, and facilities maintenance industries. NEW focuses on skilled, unionized jobs in the trades with starting wages averaging $15 per hour, benefits, and a path to higher-wage employment.

Totally hot! Not only is the promise of career advancement exciting, this is an organization that clearly encourages every member to bring her whole self to work. In the construction field, we’re talking about revealing and engaging the full extent of your strength, stamina and dexterity, plus so much more.

Now women aren’t the only ones pursuing less traditional occupations. There’s an increasing number of men taking up the role of C.E.O. support system, also known as “husband of the C.E.O.”  From the New York Times story on the men who support women C.E.O.s:

Asked at a Barnard College conference what men could do to help advance women’s leadership, Rosabeth Moss Kanter, a professor at Harvard Business School and author of the landmark “Men and Women of the Corporation,” answered, “The laundry.”

When women and men eagerly take on non-traditional pursuits, we all benefit. These pioneers demonstrate the hard-won fulfillment and freedom that can come with eschewing the trappings of gender.

Watch the stories of some of New York City’s strongest:

This video almost brings tears to our eyes. It’s a shining example of bringing your whole self to work, for sure.

Image via

Don’t Evaluate Your Performance [video]

Haig Chahinian

Word’s getting out that performance evaluations can do significant damage in the workplace. From “Get Rid of the Performance Review” in the Wall Street Journal: “[An evaluation] destroys morale, kills teamwork and hurts the bottom line. And that’s just for starters.”

What to do?

Listen to Courtney Love, natch. We just can’t contain our unending adoration of her.

In an interview last year supporting Hole’s album Nobody’s Daughter, rather than evaluating her performance, she deconstructs it.

There’s a subtle, yet significant difference between the two approaches.  An analysis describes something from different angles, without necessarily drawing conclusions.  In contrast, an evaluation judges it. What do we learn from being judged? Not so much.

Yet from an analytical breakdown, we derive plenty. Love analyzes her recent work experience in typically forthright form.  The gems:

[In Austin, Texas] I engaged the audience more, I gave them more. I don’t know if I can do that all the time. Because I give too much when I give. And I don’t know that people are appreciating what they’re seeing, and even if they are, I don’t know if that’s enough for me. So I’m very conflicted about my job.

You note her open ambivalence about her livelihood?  Nearly all of us feel ambivalent about some aspects of our employment.  In thinking critically about her relationship to her work, it feels like she’s learning about her self as she speaks.

The internal conflict continues: Read more →

Come Out at Work: As Atheist [video]

Haig Chahinian

Religion is a touchy subject; just reading this post’s title makes us go “eek!” inside.

In many organizations, executives promote a message that people of all faiths are welcome, and that no one religion is espoused. Then they close on Christmas, which suggests that the Christian persuasion indeed is most valued.

So in a work environment where having a religious identity is expected, what can we do if we’re atheist?

Evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins, increasingly the go-to spokesperson for atheists, has an answer: come out as such.  The author of The Selfish Gene (Oxford University Press, 1976 and 2006) was recently featured in the New York Times, and he spoke about his upbringing, his beliefs about the world, and of course, his work. Michael Powell relates several facets of Dr. Dawkins, including:

His impatience with religion is palpable, almost wriggling alive inside him. Belief in the supernatural strikes him as incurious, which is perhaps the worst insult he can imagine.

On working in Britain:

It is a measure of Britain’s more resolutely secular culture that Professor Dawkins can pursue his atheism and probing, provocative views of Islam and Christianity in several prime-time television documentaries.

On perceptions of him by his peers:

Critics grow impatient with Professor Dawkins’s atheism. They accuse him of avoiding the great theological debates that enrich religion and philosophy, and so simplifying the complex.

And finally, his thoughts on the future:

He talks of the possibility that we might co-evolve with computers, a silicon destiny.

We ponder that too!

In revealing his philosophical beliefs as they connect with his research and areas of expertise, Richard Dawkins models coming out at work as an atheist. Which would seem scary, and yet he looks very comfortable.

Watch the video below, in which he talks about “coming out” as an atheist.

If you identify as atheist, are you out at work?

Image via

The Cost of “Staying In” at Work

Haig Chahinian

National Coming Out Day is approaching, which makes us think about coming out at work. At Whole Wide Work we explore this idea many days of the year, yet it’s nice to be reminded every October about the complexities of coming out.

But you know what’s more difficult than coming out?  Staying in.

Not revealing our whole self at work can involve concealing the truth. Hiding typically takes the form of withholding information, or presenting an altered version of who we are. The big problem is, presenting less-true aspects of our selves demands a wide array of resources! Scientific American Mind–one of our favorite periodicals–in the current issue breaks down the specifics of how taxing it is to fib:

To start, you need to invent a story, and you also have to monitor that tale constantly so it is plausible and consistent with the known facts. That task takes a lot of mental effort that innocent truth tellers do not have to spend. You also need to actively remember the details of the story you’ve fabricated so that you don’t contradict yourself at any point… Because you’re worried about your credibility, you’re most likely trying to control your demeanor, and “looking honest” also saps mental energy…  Like an actor, you have the mental demands of staying in character. And finally, you have to suppress the truth so that you don’t let some damning fact slip out—another drain on your mind’s limited supply of fuel. In short, the truth is automatic and effortless, and lying is the opposite of that. It is intentional, deliberate and exhausting.

Now imagine the wherewithal it takes to get job-related tasks done amidst the additional burden of stifling your self. It seems a waste of precious resources–your personal energy–to be sure.

Are you “staying in” at work? How much work does it take?

Image via

Fit In, Stay True to Your Self

Haig Chahinian

We were away the last few weeks, and worked to enjoy summer time with family. During our break, we really let our hair down. That is, we stopped shaving (photo near right). The feeling of a fuzzy face was fabulous.

After Labor Day it was time to go back to work, and we typically toil in buttoned-up office environments where conservative, formal appearance is valued.

Read: no beards allowed.

What were we to do? We could remain unshaven, stand firm on our freedom of self-expression, and rebel against the unwritten rules. No corporate culture would dictate how we present ourselves to the world!

Then, the night before our first day back to a hermetically-sealed high rise, we shaved. Did we give in? Worse, did we give up? Yes, and no. We gave in to the “look like the rest of us” dynamic of the places where we often conduct work, yet we did not give up.

We like to practice what we preach, and bring our full selves to work. In making the decision to fit in superficially–meaning, on the outside–we freed up the considerable energy it takes to reveal and engage the full spectrum of our internal wherewithal. Which is what we appreciate the most.

So it was a little humiliating at first to shave off the beard we were growing to love. Yet the trade-off of homogeneity on the outside for diversity on the inside is worth it. We fit in and align ourselves on the surface with people at work, so that we can be free to leverage the less common parts of our selves that truly represent who we are.

How does fitting in at work help you stay true to your self? And what are the benefits?